The most important question you will answer today

"ttyymmnn" (ttyymmnn) 06/02/2016 at 10:10 • Filed to: None

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Toilet paper: Over or under?

TheHondaBro > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 10:14

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Over. I’m not a moron.

Out, but with a W - has found the answer > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 10:14

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It’s not a question if there’s only one allowable answer.

Turbineguy: Nom de Zoom > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 10:14

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Under. Because God intended it to be that way.

TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts. > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 10:16

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Over obviously

Nonster > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 10:17

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Over, unless your damn savage

or have cats

MonkeePuzzle > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 10:17

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I have my servants bring me pre-torn portions, folded/crumpled per my particular requirements. I don’t care how they hold their roll, just so long as I never need to see it!

Rico > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 10:18

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Under

Party-vi > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 10:18

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IF YOU PREFER TOILET PAPER UNDER THEN I WILL ALSO ASSUME YOU THROW YOUR FECES AT PASSERS-BY AND YOU HOLD YOUR UTENSILS LIKE A NEANDERTHAL

Party-vi > Turbineguy: Nom de Zoom 06/02/2016 at 10:19

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You mean Satan, right?

Jcarr > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 10:20

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This shouldn’t even be a question. It’s mere existence makes me question society as a whole.

Ash78, voting early and often > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 10:20

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Over. Because every second counts and if I wanted to reach blindly under something to find the dangly bit, I'd use the bathroom at Target. /toosoon?

MonkeePuzzle > Party-vi 06/02/2016 at 10:21

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utensilS? HAH! plural? the ignorant savages often just use one utensil, and just mash things with the side of their fork to “cut” them.

Pixel > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 10:21

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Whichever way the roll happens to be facing when I put it on the holder. I can’t manage to care that much about something I’m going to literally cover in shit.

TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts. > Turbineguy: Nom de Zoom 06/02/2016 at 10:21

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Then there is no God...

V12 Jake- Hittin' Switches > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 10:21

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Over. This is the only way.

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 10:22

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Over. Less excess rollout, reduced risk of poo-hand on wall, easier recovery.I get that it’s harder for a cat to grab if it’s next to the wall, but come on, now.

On an unrelated note, I’m assuming you saw this?

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2016/05/2…

smobgirl > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 10:23

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Under, because cats. Otherwise over.

MonkeePuzzle > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 10:25

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under does seem to work...

AfromanGTO > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 10:27

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Over like the inventor and the good lord intended. Unless you are some heathen who will be judged properly.

That Bastard Kurtis - An Attempt to Standardize My Username Across Platforms > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 10:28

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I think the answer to that question depends on whether or not you also have a cat/particularly annoying dog. If you go under, your douchebag animal can’t unravel it by pawing at it, as they tend to do.

Turbineguy: Nom de Zoom > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 10:28

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Where is your god now?

EL_ULY > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 10:30

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Mink sweater

MUSASHI66 > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 10:30

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Over. One and only possible answer. I am a reasonable human being and I understand that there are opinions about everything, but not about this.

Plus, if you ever look at dispensers which have slots that feed the paper through them, they only work with over.

The real question is, how do you sit on the toilet? With your back to the tank, or with the tank in front of you, so you can use it as a shelf while you read your book?

Snuze: Needs another Swede > MUSASHI66 06/02/2016 at 10:32

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The real question is, how do you sit on the toilet? With your back to the tank, or with the tank in front of you, so you can use it as a shelf while you read your book?

Never tried that... Hmm...

Snuze: Needs another Swede > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 10:33

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Over. Only over.

Azrek > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 10:33

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The most important thing...”Is there toilet paper after taco Thursday?”

ttyymmnn > EL_ULY 06/02/2016 at 10:35

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Merkin.

MUSASHI66 > Snuze: Needs another Swede 06/02/2016 at 10:35

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ttyymmnn > That Bastard Kurtis - An Attempt to Standardize My Username Across Platforms 06/02/2016 at 10:35

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Or children. You see, there is always a gray area. Nothing is absolute.

ttyymmnn > Jcarr 06/02/2016 at 10:37

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We would not have advanced this far (which is actually debatable) if philosophers didn’t take the time to ponder the great questions of our existence.

Takuro Spirit > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 10:37

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Over. Now the more important question:

Wiping

Standing or Sitting?

ttyymmnn > Party-vi 06/02/2016 at 10:37

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What’s a utensil?

Sam > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 10:38

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I setting the roll on the tank an option? Because that is what I usually do.

ttyymmnn > Takuro Spirit 06/02/2016 at 10:39

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Kneeling. Don’t ask.

Party-vi > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 10:39

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The thing you use to brush your hair or pick your teeth.

TheHondaBro > Party-vi 06/02/2016 at 10:42

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Those simpletons probably eat cereal with a fork.

phenotyp > MonkeePuzzle 06/02/2016 at 10:43

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Oh god I love that gif.

Svart Smart, traded in his Smart > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 10:43

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Over, duh.

Mattbob > Takuro Spirit 06/02/2016 at 10:44

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the day I realized as a child that I could wipe while sitting was a major milestone in my life. Definitely sitting.

TheHondaBro > Turbineguy: Nom de Zoom 06/02/2016 at 10:44

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When zip ties are life.

Mattbob > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 10:44

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over.

TheHondaBro > Takuro Spirit 06/02/2016 at 10:44

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Standing.

TheHondaBro > MonkeePuzzle 06/02/2016 at 10:45

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I have mine warmed to a temperature of 99.5° F.

ttyymmnn > Party-vi 06/02/2016 at 10:45

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Oh. I thought it was that floppy thing in my throat.

Wait. That doesn't sound right.

MonkeePuzzle > TheHondaBro 06/02/2016 at 10:48

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a fine addition, I shall request my procedure be updated

TheHondaBro > MonkeePuzzle 06/02/2016 at 10:49

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I honestly wonder what warm toilet paper would feel like.

Cé hé sin > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 10:57

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Neither. The roll sits on the window sill when not in use.

ttyymmnn > Cé hé sin 06/02/2016 at 10:57

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Heathen.

GasolineLollipop191 > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 10:58

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Over just as it was designed.

That Bastard Kurtis - An Attempt to Standardize My Username Across Platforms > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 11:03

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Exactly. Though a kid might just grab it and pull, or put the end in the toilet and flush it. Children are terrible.

EL_ULY > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 11:03

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lol ewww!

ttyymmnn > GasolineLollipop191 06/02/2016 at 11:04

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I had no idea there was a patent for that. But I'm not surprised.

ttyymmnn > That Bastard Kurtis - An Attempt to Standardize My Username Across Platforms 06/02/2016 at 11:05

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I know. I have three.

JawzX2, Boost Addict. 1.6t, 2.7tt, 4.2t > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 11:09

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Those who answer “under” are shape-shifting lizard-people and have marked themselves for elimination once The Awakening takes hold.

Rustholes-Are-Weight-Reduction > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 11:11

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Under, because cats (not mine, but to illustrate my point):

scoob > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 11:11

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I have so many “wat”’s to give you.

ttyymmnn > Rustholes-Are-Weight-Reduction 06/02/2016 at 11:12

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Children do the same thing.

scoob > TheHondaBro 06/02/2016 at 11:13

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I use zip ties to wipe.

TheHondaBro > scoob 06/02/2016 at 11:14

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I know.

scoob > TheHondaBro 06/02/2016 at 11:17

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Get out of my bathroom!

TheHondaBro > scoob 06/02/2016 at 11:19

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You haven’t seen me yet? I blend in perfectly with your shaggy shower mat.

FoilyDoily > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 11:22

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Over.

http://www.businessinsider.com/patent-shows-r…

Party-vi > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 11:24

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( °  °)

BREADwagon > GasolineLollipop191 06/02/2016 at 11:28

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Came here to post this, was not disappointed.

The Dummy Gummy > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 11:36

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Over if you enjoy the finer things in life.

Under if you want to watch the world burn.

James May is my spirit animal > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 11:52

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Fetal position, between the legs. Only genuine way.

Dean Beyer > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 11:57

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Over unless your cat is an asshole. My cat is not an asshole. So, over.

James May is my spirit animal > Cé hé sin 06/02/2016 at 11:57

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No one is safe.

Dean Beyer > Rustholes-Are-Weight-Reduction 06/02/2016 at 11:57

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Not all cats.

I think I need to put that on a t-shirt.

IanZ - limited-slip indifferential > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 12:26

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OVER!!! I shall put my toilet paper over until the sun dies and the earth is only a rocky frozen wasteland.

IanZ - limited-slip indifferential > Turbineguy: Nom de Zoom 06/02/2016 at 12:28

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Well I’m now an atheist...

IanZ - limited-slip indifferential > Dean Beyer 06/02/2016 at 12:28

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“Not all cats” THAT’S WHAT THEY ALL SAY!

IanZ - limited-slip indifferential > RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht 06/02/2016 at 12:29

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How do you get poo on your hands before you wipe? Have I been pooping wrong my entire life?

IanZ - limited-slip indifferential > Party-vi 06/02/2016 at 12:32

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Even worse, those “unders” probably use...

THE SPORK

DuN DUn DUuUuUuUhHhHhH!!!!

Party-vi > IanZ - limited-slip indifferential 06/02/2016 at 12:45

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The spork is a technological marvel worthy of mention along side the great pyramids at Giza and Hagia Sophia!

HammerheadFistpunch > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 12:51

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marshknute > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 13:03

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Trick question: SIDEWAYS!

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > IanZ - limited-slip indifferential 06/02/2016 at 13:10

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Conjecturally, it is possible to have poo hands after a first wipe, so the risk sets in at the second. Say, if one is having a massive diarrhea crap.

Turbineguy: Nom de Zoom > Takuro Spirit 06/02/2016 at 14:16

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Front to back? Back to front? You *will* be graded on this.

Dru > Turbineguy: Nom de Zoom 06/02/2016 at 14:47

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Little of both. Getting clean is of the utmost importance.

Turbineguy: Nom de Zoom > Dru 06/02/2016 at 14:53

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Is a bidet considered cheating?

Dru > Turbineguy: Nom de Zoom 06/02/2016 at 15:29

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I don’t think so. The conventional method, on some level, is smearing stuff around until its mostly gone. Cleaning with water seems natural.

The Compromiser > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 18:36

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ttyymmnn > The Compromiser 06/02/2016 at 19:48

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TMI

gmporschenut also a fan of hondas > Dru 06/02/2016 at 23:19

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this thread is amazing

gmporschenut also a fan of hondas > ttyymmnn 06/02/2016 at 23:21

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typically over, but the one half bath was built before building codes. Thus under for if over it rubs your leg and that’s just creepy.

BayAreaMiataBoi > ttyymmnn 06/03/2016 at 12:31

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Shitposting again?!?!?!